Happy Mother's Day

With Mother’s Day around the corner, I wanted to share a few things about the friend and role model I have in my mother.

I think of Marcia as the antique. Every year she gets more and more beautiful. I envision her a bride at 18: a child draped in white lace, advancing down the aisle towards young love. This was the path to the family that would be her self-proclaimed greatest joy and purpose in life.

Marcia had her first son at age 20. Two years later, after nine months of craving pickles, ice cream and fruit loops, Marcia gave birth to me. Over the next five years her and dad gave me a younger sister and a younger brother. Marcia worked from home and made certain her family joined each night for a home-cooked meal. The six of us seated around the dinner table is my fondest childhood memory.

I remember dancing around the living room with my mom to Chaka Khan, Billy Ocean, The Commodores and Kool & the Gang. The windows were open. In the backyard, laundry on the clothesline swayed in the breeze. The sun shot through the windows making big, bright squares on the carpet. We danced and danced. I spun myself in circles before falling to the ground. Childhood was a spinning room of music, dancing, sunshine and family.

With a farmer for a husband, Marcia cared for more than her own children. She nursed orphaned baby lambs to health in our basement. I’m simply amazed at how she did it all, especially taking four kids to the grocery store without making a scene. Our clothes were always clean and our home, always spotless. She taught responsibility and ran a tight ship. Our rules were strict but revealed to us her compassion. Like other kids, we weren’t allowed to throw our toys or hurt or siblings. But more importantly we weren’t allowed to call each other names like “dumb” or “stupid.”

Marcia curled her daughters’ hair and told us we were beautiful. She never missed a parent-teacher conference and praised her children for doing well in school. She made a point to tell us we were smart. Marcia is a strong woman. A survivor. She vowed to give her children everything she never had but always wanted. She chose to break a cycle and create a life for her children based upon unconditional love, support, praise and self-worth. For this I am eternally grateful, because it has made me who I am today.

I would like to reverse the roles and thank the special woman who I call mama. I would like to tell her how smart, beautiful and courageous she is. And while I know she may not totally believe me, she raised me to always tell the truth. Happy Mother’s Day.